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Mediation Generally

A mediator is a person hired to assist you and your spouse in reaching agreements. Mediators do not make decisions for you nor should they side with one spouse or the other. A mediator, also does not guarantee that an agreement is fair. The state provides mediators at a lower rate than that charged by most private mediators (but often state mediators are busier and harder to get into quickly). Mediators range from attorneys with little mediation training, to professional mediators with years of training. They can offer structured settlement negotiations (typically held in separate rooms) to facilitated communication, where the parties are in one room and emphasis is placed on ensuring that everyone is hearing what the other side is saying. Your case and its individual disputes will dictate what mediator is the best choice for your particular circumstance. In addition to different mediation styles, there are mediators who specialize in certain types of financial situations or particular child issues. Choose wisely – investment in a good mediator can be a very wise expenditure of money.

Recommended Reading

Fisher, Roger, Ury William, and Patton, Bruce, ed. Getting to Yes. Second Ed. A Penguin Book, 1991.

 

Haynes, John M. The Fundamentals of Family Mediation. State University of New York Press, 1994.

 

Mayer, Bernard. Staying With Conflict. John Wiley & Sons, 2009.

 

Moore, Christopher W. The Mediation Process: Practical Strategies for Resolving Conflict. Jossey-Bass—An Imprint of Wiley, 2003.

 

Mosten, Forrest S. Collaborative Divorce Handbook: Helping Families Without Going To Court. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2009. Print.

 

Saposnek, Donald T. Mediating Child Custody Disputes. Rev. Ed. Josey Bass Publishers, 1998.