Navigating a divorce can be emotionally and legally challenging, especially when it comes to managing your digital presence. In this detailed guide, we’ll explore ten critical tips to help you handle social media and electronic communications wisely during your divorce proceedings. These steps are crucial to protect your privacy and ensure that digital missteps do not negatively impact your case.
1. Secure Your Digital Accounts
Upon filing for divorce, immediately change all passwords and login credentials. In many cases, spouses may share access to devices like iCloud accounts, iPads, and MacBooks, as well as social media accounts. It’s common for ex-partners to access emails or other private information through shared devices, including those used by children. By updating your passwords, you ensure your personal information remains private and secure. Do not assume any of your accounts are private until you have changed all of your passwords.
2. Maintain Separate iCloud Accounts
Ensure that every family member, including children, has individual iCloud accounts. Sharing an account can inadvertently expose sensitive information to your estranged spouse through activities as innocent as game playing or app usage by children. This can compromise your privacy and weaken your position in divorce proceedings.
This most commonly occurs when a child takes an iPad from one house to another house and where the iPad has login credentials for one of the parents. In some cases, we have seen parents instruct children to put in the password so that the parent can access the device (which also has the ex spouse’s information on it).
3. Think Before You Post on Social Media
Social media platforms can become a field of landmines during a divorce. For instance, posts depicting extravagant purchases or holidays can be used against you in court to challenge claims of financial hardship. Similarly, posts that suggest dishonesty about your whereabouts or health can undermine your credibility. Moreover, avoid posting images that could be viewed as irresponsible parenting, like unsafe driving speeds or inappropriate situations involving your children.
When you complain that you are sick and at home, your spouse can get copies of those pictures on the London Bridge or in Paris and show you are lying. Drunken parties do not help in your custody cases. Traveling at 100 MPH with your child and posting a picture of the odometer is not helpful. Hanging your two year old over a balcony and posting it on Facebook won’t help your case.
4. Be Cautious with New Relationships
Displaying your new romantic engagements on social media can create additional emotional tension and escalate legal battles, potentially leading to increased legal fees. It’s advisable to keep such personal developments private to avoid inflaming the situation further.
5. Understand the Visibility of Your Financial Expenditures
Be aware that credit card statements and other financial documents are typically accessible to your spouse during a divorce. Discretionary spending, especially on items that could be perceived as lavish or unnecessary, can provoke strong emotional reactions and complicate settlement negotiations.
6. Do not publish the advice received from your attorney on Social Media or copy your friends and family on your attorney client communications
Never share legal advice you’ve received from your attorney on social media, nor include friends or family in communications intended to be confidential between you and your lawyer. Doing so can strip these communications of their protected status, significantly disadvantaging you.
7. Handle Text Messages with Care
Be cautious with text messaging. Unless you fully understand your phone’s privacy settings, incoming messages may be visible to anyone in immediate proximity to your device. Text messages are a common way infidelities or other sensitive information are inadvertently revealed.
8. Consider Location Tracking Implications
Apps like Find My iPhone and Friend Finder can be used to track your location. Reflect on the implications of being tracked by your spouse or tracking them, and manage your app settings accordingly to maintain your privacy.
9. Respect the Law Regarding Electronic Eavesdropping
Intercepting emails or text messages without consent can be illegal under certain circumstances and could lead to serious legal consequences. It is important to respect these boundaries and consult your attorney if you believe your privacy is being violated.
10. Manage Emotions in Written Communications
Avoid sending emotionally charged or impulsive emails and text messages to your spouse. Once sent, these messages can be used as evidence in court. If you feel compelled to write something in the heat of the moment, draft it and revisit the message later when you can review it with a clearer mind.
Suzanne Griffiths is the Managing Shareholder and CEO of Griffiths Law PC. She was recognized by the Best Lawyers in America© 2019-2024 for family law and was selected to Colorado Superlawyers from 2005-2024. She was also recognized in 5280 magazines for Top Lawyer in Family Law in Denver from 2016-2024.
Christopher Griffiths is CFO and Shareholder at Griffiths Law PC and focuses his practice on complex civil litigation and family law matters. His civil litigation practice focuses on construction, insurance, real estate, commercial, and business disputes. His family law practice focuses on divorce and related domestic relations matters.